tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-226533372024-03-13T15:11:29.451-04:00On My Own Two FeetThoughts on life and love and happiness from a husband, father, teacher, foodie, Christ-follower.Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.comBlogger106125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-90094592970997115122011-01-16T12:07:00.003-05:002011-01-16T12:11:45.131-05:00It's been one weekJoshua was born last week, and it's been one wonderful week, I tell ya. Between the diaper changes and middle-of-the-night feedings, I don't know I've ever been more in love or more excited to be married to Kelly! Joshua has done well in his first week of life, and he's feeling more comfortable in his own skin and in his surroundings.<div><br /></div><div>Kelly and I are so thankful for friends who've come and spent time, helped out, cleaned, and brought groceries. We're so thankful for God's provision and his church in Memphis!</div>Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-22101748803389869332011-01-09T10:45:00.002-05:002011-01-09T10:50:43.068-05:00IT'S BABY TIME!Kelly and I are in the Labory & Delivery room waiting for our son to be born. We've been watching for him to come over the past week, and it looks like he's definitely going to be an independent thinker. Kelly had consistent contractions all day yesterday, but he was still content to stay with Mami. Well, this morning, he decided that he's ready to join us; we've been telling him over the past two weeks that he'd have much more room to play in his room than inside Mami. :)<div><br /></div><div>At any rate, he's coming TODAY!!! We're so excited!!!! As we were driving to the hospital, I told Kelly that today definitely changes the entire course of our lives.</div>Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-86179481967623306992011-01-01T19:20:00.003-05:002011-01-01T19:43:25.806-05:00Welcome 2011!Welcome back to On My Own Two Feet. It's been almost two years since my last post, and a lot has happened in that time. I wrote my last post from my little living room in my apartment in the Cuatro Caminos neighborhood of Madrid. I was an assistant English teacher and had been married barely six months. We were attending Oasis Madrid Church, and we had our whole lives ahead of us.<div><br /></div><div>Since March 2009, my wife and I moved to Memphis, Tennessee, in order for me to start teaching at a charter school. Since moving to Memphis, we have had heartaches and triumphs. I am now writing from the den in the house we bought; my wife is now nine months pregnant with our first child, and the car we bought is in our driveway. I'm about to start a new job--my school let me go since they had to "divert resources" to other areas, and Spanish is not a required subject in middle school.</div><div><br /></div><div>And I turn 30 in seven weeks.</div><div><br /></div><div>I feel like I've spent so much of the past 10 years trying to prove that I was old enough to take on life. I'd always had friends older than me, and after I graduated college, I moved to Spain to start a new life and grad school. Now that I'm on the other end of my 20s, I feel like I'm not trying as hard to prove that I'm old enough. With my son being born soon, I feel like I have a pass to be young and learn new things as he learns.</div>Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-36206440310241078192009-03-18T07:00:00.002-04:002009-03-18T07:07:58.606-04:00forgivenessi´m glad i´m not God because there are some things i don´t know i could forgive. at least, i don´t know if i could forgive without first doling out consequences or making someone pay for their past, then no longer remembering their wrongdoings.<br /><br />this comes about after reading of the guilty plea of josef fritzl, the "monster of amstetten," in austria, who locked his daughter away for 24 years and raped her continuously. if he repented and turned his life to Jesus, who is the author and perfector of our faith and through whom we are reconciled to God the Father, he would be as equal a co-heir with Christ in his kingdom as i would be. as a human, i don´t like that idea very much because of the pain he has caused not only his daughter, but her children. these victims now live in a different part of the country with new identities and are receiving intense counseling, but what about the scars of their past?<br /><br />scars heal our wounds and help make us new, but they also mark a part of our past; each one has a story. Jesus´ blood washes clean our wounds of sin and makes us a new creation! it´s the great wonder of salvation, and it´s freely given to us without holding anything over our heads. that´s another thing that´s hard to reconcile as humans--a free gift.Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-410258593786363772009-03-05T11:39:00.003-05:002009-03-05T11:50:26.635-05:00just waiti've heard a lot in my life about waiting. i've waited to get through my illness. i've waited for a wife. i've waited for my studies. i've waited for my job as an auxiliar to be processed. i've waited for residency and for residency to be renewed. there's been a lot of waiting in my life.<br /><br />one thing i've learned about waiting is that the waiting itself is part of the journey, not just a holding pattern before things start. i've tried to seek the Lord in times of waiting to listen to what he has to say to me and learn from the experience as a preparation for the next step.<br /><br />just wait.Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-85494906533636323862009-02-18T08:06:00.001-05:002009-02-18T08:06:59.458-05:00Air 1's verse of the day<p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 51); font-size: 2em; line-height: 1.3em;">"For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases Him. "</p> Philippians 2:13, NLTPaulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-21865848787399298242008-12-06T09:18:00.003-05:002008-12-06T09:25:23.426-05:00beauty in the brokentoday's title comes from the starfield album "beauty in the broken". they have one song entitled "the hand that holds the world". i thought of this song as today, abruptly, my hips started feeling heavy and kind of hurting. it's 90% humidity today with a 40-70% chance of rain, too.<br /><br />i found this verse in james 1:18: He chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created.<br /><br />God chose us through truth to be the light of his creation. i can dig that when i'm hurting. it's not my fault. it's not his, either. i'm just trying to hold onto his hand. job 12:10 says: "In his hand is the life of every creature and the breath of all mankind."<br /><br />satan, in Jesus' name we renounce your works and the control you may have over this world. we reclaim the power of his Kingdom on this earth and declare victory in Jesus' name!Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-80421406270146396332008-12-05T07:50:00.002-05:002008-12-05T07:55:33.423-05:00oil cani started wearing a knee brace to help stabilize my left leg this week. i've had it a little while, but haven't worn it. and sometimes it squeaks. i feel a little bionic. hee hee.<br /><br />~the tin man<br /><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X-VGxYAVx-0">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X-VGxYAVx-0</a>Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-82888339901074007522008-11-28T08:38:00.003-05:002008-11-28T09:07:31.984-05:00doctor's note<em>as a prelude, i have an acquired neuromuscular disorder that started 5 years ago, which causes intermittent weakness and weak function. i have not had any new symptoms nor an increase in frequency in the past two months, but the fact that they persist without diagnosis nor real prognosis has caused me to reinitiate a search for a diagnosis.</em><br /><br />this morning, i went to the doctor to review the tests he ordered last week. it seems like so much time has passed since i went to the doctor just last week, but in that time i had blood drawn and a blood and urine test last friday. yesterday i picked up the results and went to the doctor today.<br /><br />i'm normal.<br /><br />all the tests--5 pages of results--came out completely normal. and my face hung. i feel frustrated, almost let down, because everything came out normal. it's frustrating to obviously have something physically wrong with me, but the paper say that everything's fine. and this is what i went through 5 years ago, too: obvious symptoms, but normal results. i feel let down because i almost wanted them to find something wrong. it may be bad, but at least it has a name. it may not cause any worsening of my symptoms, but at least it's treatable. it's one thing to take medicine to aide with the symptoms--what i did for 4 years--but another to actually treat the cause or even find something that could make me better.<br /><br />it's been 5 years almost to the day since i first went to the doctor here in madrid. i was studying here during the fall of 2003. i was supposed to stay the academic year (coincidentally, i would have met kelly in january 2004), but since i got sick and needed more tests, i moved back to georgia to pursue medical care and be taken care of by my parents. now, 5 years later, i'm in madrid again, and as the anniversary of my illness rolled around, i started thinking about going back to the doctor. maybe someone in this city, a center for pioneering medical research, could actually find something. and since i don't have to pay for my insurance--paid for by the ministry of education, my employer--kelly convinced me to go ahead and go to the doctor.<br /><br />i'm stronger now than i was 5 years ago. or 3 years ago. or even 1 year ago. i feel better now than i did even 6 months ago, which is also frustrating because i don't want to scorn the good health i enjoy now by still focusing on the physical problems i have. as i walked to the bus stop this morning, i passed a man who was crippled, begging on the sidewalk. he was sitting there, legs shriveled beneath him and begging for coins. i walked briskly past with my foldable cane neatly in it's case in my bag.<br /><br />i am absolutely so thankful for being able to walk! why should i push forward to find something wrong with me when i've already gained back so much that i had once lost? and this is my fundamental spiritual quandary. how do i reconcile being thankful for the good health i have with recognizing that my episodes of weakness are not normal?Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-89427381110984305512008-11-25T12:18:00.002-05:002008-11-25T12:27:23.531-05:00thanksgivingi'm thinking about advent and the hope that we have as christians, and i'm thinking about the children i teach. some are very outgoing and outspoken, and i can tell that they are well-adjusted and have families who love them very much. and there are those who look sad in class all the time. i don't know if they're frustrated about not understanding the lesson or if there is something else wrong with them physically, emotionally or developmentally. or perhaps there's discontent in the home, and the only place they may receive any kind of affection or attention is at school. unfortunately, because these are the children who crave the affection of an adult so much, they're also the ones who act out the most, therefore the attention they receive is not reassuring affection, rather rebuking and punishment.<br /><br />how can i teach these kids and show them Jesus' love for them at the same time if it doesn't seem like they're receptive? there are certain kids i know that if i asked them a question, we'd be 5 minutes before they said anything, so better to ask another kid in the interest of classtime. these same kids will spend twice as long on a class activity, and i don't have the time to give them individual attention in class while every other kid also needs my help.<br /><br />how can i show them their worth in the eyes of their Heavenly Father when i don't have the time to sit with them to make sure they write the date correctly?<br /><br />how long did the israelites wait for the Messiah to come and show them he loved them and would take care of them? how patient did the Messiah have to be in order to show the jews that free love and mercy were available in him, that he was the author of eternal life? how frustrated does the Father continually get with us when we want to color the banana orange or say "i'm six" instead of "i'm fine"? and who shows us that kindness, love, affection and reassurance when we look down or don't know how to respond?Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-72235378228147261982008-11-19T07:28:00.002-05:002008-11-19T07:51:52.224-05:00and we're backback to blogging. back to processing things on "paper" and seeking responses.<br /><br />and i went to the doctor this morning.<br /><br />this morning i woke up really stiff and weak and even had an episode of spastic paralysis in that while i was eating breakfast, i leaned forward to get my coffee and after i leaned back on the sofa, my muscles were rigid, and i couldn't move. this hasn't happened in quite some time, and kelly even noticed how rigid my arm was; she could hardly move it. this is the opposite from my other episodes, which are flacid, and my limbs are easily moved and positioned comfortably. though the episode didn't last long, it was a strong enough sign for me to call in sick today, and go to the doctor.<br /><br />fortunately, i pass by a rather large clinic on my way to work everyday, and i knew they accepted my insurance (provided by the government as part of my job!), so i called an made an immediate appointment with a general practicioner. i had been thinking of going to the doctor again, since it's been about a year and a half, and i haven't had any more tests or any other suggestions for possible diagnoses. the doctor this morning asked me why i came in, and i just told him about this morning as the last incident in a long list of episodes and syptoms dating back to five years ago almost exactly. he listened to me and kelly, as she went with me, for almost half an hour and was indignant that i had spent the last 5 years with just having symptoms treated and no diagnosis nor possible diagnosis. he didn't even touch me, but was pleased to listen. frankly, he said this is neuromuscular--something i've said from the very beginning--rather than just neurological or just muscular. he recognized that i had a lot of tests already, so he didn't even bother ordering a repeat of those now, but he did order some simple bloodwork to be done as a starting point.<br /><br />the good thing, other than having a doctor who actually listened to me, is that we live in madrid with major health facilities and good insurance which will pay for a lot, if not all, of my bills. i didn't even pay a co-pay this morning! and on top of all the good that happened this morning, kelly was right there with me. she reminded me that i'm not in this alone, and that's super comforting.<br /><br />well, i took an impromptu day off, which happened to correspond with kelly's, so we're both relaxing today. the weather is beautiful, and the colors on the trees in the city are beautiful, too. other than my more-than-usual weakness, it's been a good day so far. how's that for perspective?<br /><br />hasta pronto.Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-39126164466405661732008-09-08T07:29:00.003-04:002008-09-08T07:39:47.929-04:00responsibilitythis time last year, i had moved to madrid and was searching for a flat. i had enough adult responsibility to know what i needed and what i needed to do. i could shop for groceries, take public transportation, schedule my time for studies and household chores, i set up a bank account. all these things i did by myself. and though i had a roommate and we worked together around the house, we each still had our own lives and were each responsible for our own actions.<br /><br />now, i'm getting ready to settle into my "new" flat with my new wife. though it's the same flat i had last year with nate, it's different because my fiancee has moved in just over a month ago to get our home ready for us. so, this time, coming to madrid has not meant starting a new life for myself, but starting a new life for us. it's our flat, our telephone, our internet, our kitchen, our bedroom. everything's gone from being mine and yours to ours in a way very different from how nate and i had things last year.<br /><br />and this new "us" comes with new responsibility. in earning an income, i'm ensuring protection for our family. in going grocery shopping, i allow kelly to do something for her work. likewise, by kelly taking care of the household--a task she readily takes up--she is responsible for creating a welcoming atmosphere in our home for both us and our guests. are no longer responsible for ourselves, but for each other. we are accountable to each other to work for the other's best interests and for the best interests of our family.Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-18109008547975963632008-08-17T13:22:00.003-04:002008-08-17T13:52:48.173-04:00"so take the photographs and still frames in your mind""hang them on a shelf in good health and good times. tattoos and memories and dead skin on trial. for what it's worth, it was worth all the while."<br /><br />yes, folks, the middlebuy chapter is over, and i'm glad. i had a great run in 5 summers--4 in the spanish school and 1 in the french. i've proved that i can work competently at the graduate level in 2 foreign languages, one a little more foreign than the other. i've moved to madrid--twice--got sick, recovered, graduated, worked, moved back to madrid, got engaged, will move back to madrid to get married. in the past five years, i've learned more about relationships, helping others and God's omnipotence than literary theory, art history or pedagogy. i've learned the importance God placed on my life in sending his Son to die for me and that "In his hand he holds the life of every creature and the breath of all mankind" (Job 12:10). i've learned that each of us has more of an impact on each other than we may even know in this lifetime, and we all work for the glory of God's plan.<br /><br />and, yes, i learned how to conjugate some verbs and use some prepositions. i did more theatre in spanish and french than i have in english!<br /><br />after seeing my friends graduate with their master's the other day and not continuing with my own doctoral program at middlebury, i'm feeling better than i thought i would be. after my own graduation in 2005, i learned that it's all right to have a good time at school, but it's better to live your life in the present in preparation for the future.<br /><br />"there's something unpredictable and in the end it's right. i hope you had the time of your life."Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-67824227827569701452008-08-06T17:10:00.002-04:002008-08-06T17:12:35.056-04:00quelle surpriseit's raining again in vermont. quelle surprise. it's only been raining here every other day since i got here. and all this rain does not agree with my joints nor my nerves, so i didn't get to go the gym today. in the meanwhile, i'm troubleshooting why my speakers don't to relinquish control to my headphones when i plug them in.Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-52139344738874254922008-07-20T21:54:00.002-04:002008-07-20T22:07:36.598-04:00alternative pt 2after yesterday's post about alternatives, today, i had one of my own: an attack of extreme weakness and pain that kept me in bed most of this morning. though i'm healthy and regularly exercises (weights and running), there are still those times when i get pretty weak and need to eat something or rest after exertion. and i still limp on a rather regular basis, but rarely do i have episodes like this morning where my leg is heavy and numb, yet there is a shooting pain that runs the length.<br /><br />i saw a trailer of a movie the other day called <em>music within</em> based on the true story of the guy who wrote the americans with disabilities act. i want to see this movie because i identify myself as disabled. this may seem quite strange as i now lift 90 lbs in the gym, run about 3 miles 3 times a week, have lost over 40 lbs in the past year, and don't use any crutches anymore. but there's still that mental image i have of someone who is obviously not like the others because of the way he walks. that's my identity, my alternative perception of who i am. and though i have no diagnosis and currently am not taking any medicine, i still have that image of myself.<br /><br />and speaking of an alternative view of oneself, i watched the movie <em>lars and the real girl </em>with ryan gosling. see this movie! it's a touching story of a young man, lars, who is lonely and socially awkward who constructs a story about a girlfriend. it's powerful in the uniting of the family and community to help lars and how he learns about love and friendship. see this movie!Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-69302142711455803092008-07-19T18:26:00.002-04:002008-07-19T19:03:01.502-04:00alternativethe good thing about being in a liberal new england town is that things are different. whether it's eating more organic products (beer included) to being conscious of energy consumption and renewable energies, using one's own grocery bags when shopping for organic and locally grown products from the natural foods co-op, footwear (some of my most comfortable shoes were bought here in middlebury), you just know things are different up here. the very nature i've studied two foreign languages in an immersion environment in the green mountains is, by its very nature, alternative to conventional study in other parts of the country. i've also been exposed to alternative media, podcasting among others, which opens wide the news and information i receive in a time quite different from the three broadcasting networks. am i more informed about news and cultural events than my father was at my age, or is it simply a question of accessibility?<br /><br />another alternative thing popular in vermont and throughout new england is alternate sexual lifestyle, primarily homosexuality. on campus, there are signs everywhere promoting diversity and acceptance and ensuring a safe place for one to express or question his or her own sexuality. one thing i do not appreciate about this policy, as with its policy on gender discrimination, is the assumption that we all have discriminatory tendencies and that we should make every effort to accept everyone who is different from us and repress the acknowledgement that we are different--even in capabilities.<br /><br />the following are some questions i'm facing as i'm developping a friendship with someone who is in a homosexual relationship:<br />1) am i to love this person as i would anyone else who is heterosexual and a sinner?<br />2) in a list of ways to recognize the sinful nature in Galations 5, there is sexual immorality along with jealousy and others, so is someone who sins (homo)sexually different automatically from the heterosexual who has "fits of rage" or anything else on the list?<br />3) is homosexuality an unforgivable sin which automatically excludes one from salvation?Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-35840451485404317262008-07-02T10:58:00.001-04:002008-07-02T11:02:38.701-04:00foux de fa fa<a href="http://youtube.com/watch?v=FUVagbFcSUU">http://youtube.com/watch?v=FUVagbFcSUU</a>Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-50514777937759815362008-07-02T09:36:00.002-04:002008-07-02T10:01:56.546-04:00hiatusmy last post was in madrid, the day after our engagement party at oasis madrid & so much has happened in the past month on hiatus. here's a rundown:<br /><br />-left madrid for georgia<br />-in georgia for a week with my family (my brother flew in for the weekend, too!)<br />-in kentucky for a week with kelly's family<br />-kelly & i fly out of augusta--her to madrid & me to arkansas to visit my brother & his family<br />-back in augusta for two weeks<br />-fly to boston to spend the night with my recently former roommate<br />-drive up to middlebury from boston<br />-register for courses<br />-confirm courses<br /><br />so here i am foux da fa fa in vermont. yes, that's right, folks, i'm studying french at middlebury college for the summer. i wasn't sure how different or similar it would be from my time in the spanish school, but it's just different enough to warrant a different experience, so i'm looking forward to it. a highlight of the week is working out in an air-conditioned collegiate gym and not having to wait to workout on farely new machines that have all the numbers on the weights (yes, in both lbs and kg). so, when i arranged the pic on the machine to the kilos that i know, it didn't seem like all that much, but then seeing the visual reminder that pounds are twice as much as kilograms, i was quite pleased with myself for lifting all that gargantuan amount of weight. ;)Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-28300132437301900862008-05-19T12:51:00.001-04:002008-05-19T12:53:23.755-04:00winding downit's a comfort to know when you're singing the hit the road blues that anywhere else you could possibly go after madrid would be...<br /><br />a pleasure cruise.Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-7846193004446408912008-05-19T08:54:00.000-04:002008-05-19T08:55:18.246-04:00mr & mrs charminglast night was our oasis madrid engagement party. indeed, it was the first of three parties we're having in three weeks. and since it's not everyday one gets married--much less the first oasis madrid love story--everyone got dressed up a bit. how fun! we're such a relaxed church and more used to seeing everyone in jeans more often than slacks.<br /><br />it was really fun!<br /><br />kelly and i arrived in a taxi and had to give the taxi driver quite specific instructions to get the the cadys' flat. kelly wore her bonus prize dress (bought with her bonus prize money from her proposal scavenger hunt. you ask her more about it or see my post on the proposal.) i wore the same dark blue shirt i wore on our first date and some gray slacks i had bought recently. these were practically the only ones i could wear since losing about 5 or so more pounds since our first date in january (for a grand total of 40 lbs in the past year). as it turns out, i was probably more dressed up for this party than i will be for my actual wedding.<br /><br />troy gave us a great toast, and as kelly and i were in the center of the living room, very much the center of attention, i felt very blessed to be part of this family. kelly felt like a princess; i felt like prince charming. and i must admit i felt a bit like a star on the red carpet as there were so many flashes going on! :) i had brought my camera, but hardly touched it; everyone else had theirs, so i'm looking forward to seeing all these compiled memories. one thing we do really well at oasis madrid is combined memories. last night may have been just another service, as the whole church was there! and that's another thing i love about oasis madrid: we really do life together. it was amazing to see the outpouring of love last night and how much they affirm our marriage.<br /><br />this weekend starts the family tour (to continue with the rock star theme), as we travel to the junited estates on thursday to spend time with my family, then travel to see kelly's family. since my friends & family recognize how momentous it is for me to bring home a fiancee, they're rallying around to meet her. and kelly has family who's driving in about 10 hours specifically to see us; they're making this a sort of impromptu family reunion.<br /><br />an oasis madrid love story.Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-64794281370352112302008-05-14T09:07:00.003-04:002008-05-14T09:08:37.846-04:00addendumi'll also write a post on the influence of the beliefs of the catholic church to the protestant church. i realize i have yet to write a post on any of the topics i mentioned last friday, but i've been busy catching up on my sleep. ;) cheers.Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-16761043992361454152008-05-09T08:35:00.001-04:002008-05-09T14:39:33.237-04:00reflexiones<div>it's the end of the semester and school year, so it's time for my yearly reflexiones. here are some things i've been reflecting about and will be the subjects of future blog posts since this post would be enormously long if i were to put all of them in here.</div><div><br /></div><div>-immigrants</div><div>-blending</div><div>-exams</div><div>-youtubes at 4am</div><div>-new music</div><div>-bus vs metro</div><div><br /></div><div>it's been almost a year since i've moved to this lovely country, and i wonder how fast i will adapt back to america this summer. also, i wonder how it will work being in vermont this summer but under quite different circumstances, primarily being in the french school and not having kelly to hang out with and be with even though i've been up there four times already. i'm up for a challenge, though.</div>Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-55525409169918403732008-04-19T08:35:00.003-04:002008-04-19T08:38:55.136-04:00why?why is it that i feel prolific and creative at 3 in the morning when i should be asleep, but actually don't want to get up to get my journal, thereby fully waking myself up to produce said creative project, so i just lay there hoping to recreate the magic of sleepy creativity in the morning when i wake, knowing that i won't, indeed, remember the sentiment nor be able to accurately recreate the setting in which i was originally creative, hence relegating myself to wallowing in my own creativity and creation when it strikes--something akin to experiencing a first kiss?<br /><br />i guess we'll never know.Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-48476545837864268242008-04-15T11:39:00.004-04:002008-04-15T11:46:38.054-04:00imagine thatGod <em>is</em> in control. imagine that! well, after this past year of relying on God for the next move in my life, after the past three months of such an amazing and surprising relationship with kelly, and looking back to the past 5 years when God has led me and cared for me in coming to Spain in the first place and then teaching me about how he cares for me even more than the sparrows and showing me his nature as the Great Physician, i've just lost sight of how my Father actually <em>is </em>in control. i can't change that, and his plans for me are infinitely better than i could imagine on my own.<br /><br />i had a long talk with God last night as i walked home. i told him that i gave all my stresses to him. i repented of taking control of my life, of having a fatalist attitude about my work. and i thanked him for redeeming me and for being a co-heir with Christ. i claim my Father's blessings as his child. i know that doesn't mean that everything will be smooth and easy for me, but i rest in the fact that he is in charge, not me, and that i can rest easy at night belonging to him.<br /><br />you'd think i'd have learned this by now. ;)Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22653337.post-36785427307386460212008-03-20T06:22:00.004-04:002008-12-09T10:37:09.715-05:00we should get jerseys'cause we make a good team.<br /><br /><br /><br />thanks to relient k for the title of this post. i sang this line to kelly the other day as we took a daytrip to segovia. :) but for our jerseys, i think i'll get them with <strong>our</strong> last name on it. well, it's not hers yet, but it <em>will be</em> this fall! i'm sure she'll put her side of the story on <a href="http://web.mac.com/kellyinmadrid">her blog</a> but here it is on mine; besides, there are different viewpoints.<br /><br /><br /><br />i set up a scavenger hunt for her a la amazing race and enlisted friends from all over the city to help. she had a clue that led her to that person where she got a task to complete. these could be anything from memorizing a Bible verse in dutch to taking our friend's baby to a local panadería for merienda. oh and there's the part where she gave a guy friend of ours a package to unwrap and it was underwear.<br /><br /><br /><br />there are pictures.<br /><br /><br /><br />that's right, folks, she had to get a picture of completing each task. it was set up that our friend, lisa, was going to meet kelly for lunch on wednesday, then she would present her with the instructions and the first clue. lisa was so excited about the whole thing and besides being a clue herself, she really pushed for the part that there had to be photos. i asked if she would be willing to take them, and she practically squealed! and another friend, leisl, had come in from castellón to visit (and go on the church easter retreat with us), so she was at lunch, too, and went on the scavenger hunt and helped take pictures (leisl took this one. thanks!)! it was also special that they shared in this because lisa was kelly's roommate last year, and leisl and kelly did a good chunk of the camino de santiago last summer, so both are special people.)<br /><br /><br />the photos are great (i'll soon load them, but you can see others <a href="http://flickr.com/photos/profepj">here</a>), and they really show how kelly had to go all over the city all afternoon. it took her about 5 hours or so to get to me, the last clue. her last task was to follow the blue arrows ("Suivez les flèches bleues.") inspired from a scene in the movie <em>amélie</em> where<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_s6PubSMUvRo/R-JAmUeatKI/AAAAAAAAAAM/iHbBo7KbpgE/s1600-h/IMG_2582.JPG"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5179773548504986786" style="FLOAT: right; MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_s6PubSMUvRo/R-JAmUeatKI/AAAAAAAAAAM/iHbBo7KbpgE/s320/IMG_2582.JPG" border="0" /></a> she sets up blue arrows around a park in the montmartre section of paris to get the attention of a guy she likes. she got her task from mary, who simply handed her the first arrow and sent her off to me. i set up these arrows around kelly's neighborhood and pointed them to the plaza dos de mayo, where we've spent a lot of time--impromptu picnics and late night chats. she found the last arrow and came walking across the plaza. when she was about halfway, i got down on one knee and just showed her the ring.<br /><br /><br /><br />"will you marry me?"<br /><br /><br /><br />"yes."Paulo Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00878409793713652056noreply@blogger.com12