in my brokenness complete

'here i am at your feet, in my brokenness complete'

that was the last chorus that we sang this morning at tnc. it really touched me especially because after two weeks of having difficulty walking, was i was able to stand during the worship service. it was also especially moving because i played ultimate frisbee for the first time in over 3 years yesterday!! in gearing up for a series on facing the giants next week at church, i just faced one yesterday. i played with some new friends--i'm sure God put them in my life--for about 3 hours. this is extreme rejoicing in my family!

three years ago, i said goodbye to regular use of my legs. in 2004, i was in a wheelchair with limited use of my arms as well, in addition to times of altered speech (which persist). in 2005, i was walking pretty steadily on crutches (either 1 or 2). now in the fall of 2006, i'm walking pretty well, sometimes with a limp, sometimes getting a little tired, but what i have learned through all this is that though i may not be able to play ultimate frisbee again, for those hours, i was soaring on wings like eagles!!

i cannot adequately describe here the sheer exhiliration i felt at running, huffing & puffing, and ducking to grab the frisbee. it was something i grieved, something that set me apart from others, and just last week, i was feeling down because i couldn't fit in with other guys my age. because of my illness, i don't fit the typical 25 yr old guy idea, and that had been bothering me. in being a part of a church that encourages us all to be an integral part of the church body, which something i deeply believe in as well, i didn't know what i could offer. i realized just this morning during that last chorus that all i have to give is the life Christ gave to me (thanks to third day's song 'offering').

here i am at your feet, in my brokenness complete.