alternative pt 2

after yesterday's post about alternatives, today, i had one of my own: an attack of extreme weakness and pain that kept me in bed most of this morning. though i'm healthy and regularly exercises (weights and running), there are still those times when i get pretty weak and need to eat something or rest after exertion. and i still limp on a rather regular basis, but rarely do i have episodes like this morning where my leg is heavy and numb, yet there is a shooting pain that runs the length.

i saw a trailer of a movie the other day called music within based on the true story of the guy who wrote the americans with disabilities act. i want to see this movie because i identify myself as disabled. this may seem quite strange as i now lift 90 lbs in the gym, run about 3 miles 3 times a week, have lost over 40 lbs in the past year, and don't use any crutches anymore. but there's still that mental image i have of someone who is obviously not like the others because of the way he walks. that's my identity, my alternative perception of who i am. and though i have no diagnosis and currently am not taking any medicine, i still have that image of myself.

and speaking of an alternative view of oneself, i watched the movie lars and the real girl with ryan gosling. see this movie! it's a touching story of a young man, lars, who is lonely and socially awkward who constructs a story about a girlfriend. it's powerful in the uniting of the family and community to help lars and how he learns about love and friendship. see this movie!